I'm Feeling Lucky
Just to see what else is out there, I'm canvassing other internet flirting websites. The first one up is the one you go to if you enter "flirting" in Google and press "
I'm Feeling Lucky."
This website is clearly the result of eggheads trying desperately to stay in the gene pool, through the use of statistics. Once you get past that, though, it's pretty good. The website is from the Social Issues Research Center, which may or may not be a real think-tank. In any case, they bring in a lot of the kind of research you would expect and devote it entirely to understanding the phenomena of flirting. The best lines are:
They argue that the large human brain - our superior intelligence, complex language, everything that distinguishes us from animals - is the equivalent of the peacock's tail: a courtship device evolved to attract and retain sexual partners. Our achievements in everything from art to rocket science may be merely a side-effect of the essential ability to charm.
and:
So, to save the human race from extinction, and preserve the foundations of civilisation, Martini commissioned Kate Fox at the Social Issues Research Centre to review and analyse all the scientific research material on interaction between the sexes, and produce a definitive guide to the art and etiquette of enjoyable flirting.
The only drawback is that the site is essentially a long, long article all on one page. Get your scrolling thumb ready.
Flirting with Bakersfield
I don't remember who said it first. Mostly I remember Carrie Fisher saying "You could see all the way to Bakersfield." Meaning, of course, that her inflexible outfit gave co-stars a glimpse of what Janet Jackson showed everyone.
This happens a lot, yet most men don't know how to interpret it. Are women consciously showing us "Bakersfield?" Unconsciously? Is it polite to look or to rude to look away? One former server at a local coffee place used to show me Bakersfield on every visit. I just knew, as soon as I started talking to her that, no matter what she was wearing, Bakersfield would eventually pop out. Once we had dinner together and I was disappointed at first to see her wearing a conservative top. Not to fear, though. Eventually as she got excited explaining something or other (I forget what) her physical contortions managed to drop that front and give me a deep view.
There are other women who wear deep-cut tops, yet with perfect posture fail to reveal anything beyond what you get at first glance. Do they go to special training schools?
The term Bakersfield itself probably comes from the fact that in L.A., for many years, every Freeway that ran North used Bakersfield as the destination. Thus, if you wanted to go North, you followed the signs to Bakersfield. Few Los Angelinos ever made it to Bakersfield, of course. But sometimes maybe they thought the could see it.
Dangerous Beautiful Mind
According to the movie, A Beautiful Mind, John Nash developed a whole new wing of mathematics based on the principle that, if every guy is hitting on the hottest girl in the room, you'll get a lot more action if you always hit on number two. Somehow this insight could lead to mathematics solving all kinds of social issues and perhaps bringing on world peace.
That didn't work.
But, I was recently talking to two girls visiting from Russia. Girl #1 is very, very, very hot. Still, she was always friendly with me. Girl #2 is a hottie as well, but clearly in the shadow of Girl #1. It took me longer to get to know Girl #2, as she's a bit shyer. In the end, it turns out Girl #2 did seem to have a thing for me, while Girl #1 is just friendly to all guys. So, the moral is, make the move before they go back to Russia. (I didn't.) Now they are as out of reach as world peace. Still, I've learned something for the future.
Jerk gets the Girl
So there I am at Starbucks, just watching. I noticed an attractive woman when I came in. She had short dark hair, heavy black glasses, full lips, and that trim healthy look that goes with the mid-30s professional chick.
After I finished the crossword, I looked around. A big guy comes in. No tie, but wearing a button-down collar and good slacks. She greets him as he walks by, pointing to the open seat across the table from her. He grunts and goes up to get his order.
Coffee in hand, he breezes by her, goes outside and sits at an outside table. She looks a bit shocked. Then he glances back at her, gets up, opens the door and speaks. From the open door.
"There's sunlight out here," he says. "What are you waiting for?"
He turns and goes back out to the table. The woman sits there, face frozen, palm outstretched and turned up in that "WTF?" pose. She holds it for some time though he is clearly not looking at her.
I'm thinking they must have had a fight. After a few minutes, she gets up, goes out front and argues with him, though he appears not to care what she says.
A few minutes later, she comes in, gets her books, and goes out to sit with him. When I finally leave, I walk by the table to hear complaining at length about some other person. He listens to her, painfully bored.
Can this relationship be saved?
Is it really a relationship? (the guy was clearly not a "gay friend")
Is that the best way to get women?
Do you really want to be with a woman, no matter how beautiful, who cause your face to express that much boredom?
Bonding through near death
At the north end of Dupont Circle, if you are a pedestrian, you have to cross two distinct traffic sections, with a small island in between. The key here is that, if you get the walk light for the first, you will not get it for the second. However, the don't walk light can be safely ignored for up to 15 seconds.
Not so safe after that. Walk up next to the hot jeans girl with the "Jesus is my Homeboy" t-shirt. She looks at me briefly, looks at the traffic, balks once. Then, seeing the traffic is still holding its place, she steps out. Her glance back sort of asks if I will be joining her in this crime, this risk. Of course I do. We make if half-way before the horn starts, and engine revs, and she quick-steps those last few feet. I'm standing next to her, hoping for a smile. She does, even giving me a half-wave. Then she's off, cutting through the cars getting ready to move out into the circle on the West side.
